Happy Mother’s Day to all the moms out there! My daughter is four, and I still feel like I’m figuring how how this “mom” thing works. Of course, every time you figure something out, it all changes. One thing I’ve realized, though, is that it’s hard to be a mom. There’s something to be said for needing a village to raise a child. When I was pregnant, I decided I was going to go into it without any expectations. I really had no idea what to expect or whether once the baby came home I’d change my mind about things that initially seemed really important. It’s scary enough reading all the pregnancy books that tell you all the things that could GO WRONG. Then there are so many choices you have to make. Breastfeeding vs. bottle, cloth diapers vs. disposable, co-sleep or not, organic, toxins… Even just what kind of stroller to buy involves research. Then do you stay home, work, do day care, find a nanny… It’s mind boggling. And the guilt! It seems like there is always something to feel guilty about. Then the media pits moms against each other depending on the choices they make, when really, we all need to be in this together. It DOES take a village to raise a child. Different opinions, respectful opinions, are good.

Everyone has probably seen the recent cover of Time and read about all the controversy that has stirred up. Frankly, I’m not going to judge another mom for deciding what is best for her family. I don’t think I have that right. I would hope others would do the same. Bottom line, we all want our children to be healthy and happy. How we get to that point is not as important because there are so many ways to get there. We just have to deal with whatever life gives us and make decisions as they come. Sometimes nothing ends up as we expect, but we find a way to continue just the same. That’s what moms do best, right?

I also want to thank all of the women who aren’t moms and have offered support through this long, strange journey. These are the “aunts” to my daughter, the friends I live vicariously through, the ones who are willing to offer adult conversation and remind me that I’m still my own person, in addition to being “X’s mom.”

So to all my wonderful mom friends out there, I hope you were pampered and loved even more today. You deserve it!